The Steve Pavlina divorce issue is one of the most controversial topics surrounding the self-help guru.
After all, a divorcee does not make for a good example. But the way that Steve managed to turn his negative experience in marriage around and used it to further improve his life attracted more people to him, mainly because Steve was able to prove that his self-help advice really works.
Steve revealed his separation from his wife Erin back in 2009. They got a divorce soon after coming to the decision to separate, but the decision itself was difficult for them to make. With the help of their self-help blogging careers (the Steve Pavlina blogg and the blogg of Erin Pavlina), they were able to separate amicably Now, they are still connected by profession and as good friends.
Steve and Erin: How the Marriage Failed
What pulled Steve and Erin apart was their personal goals and desires.
As time wore on, they each realized that these factors led them to separate decisions. Since they wanted different things and wished to pursue different experiences, they found themselves compromising a lot.
These little incompatibilities may not seem like a big deal at first, but they do have a major effect on your overall level of contentment in life. Eventually, Steve’s and Erin’s individual discontent in the marriage started to manifest in their lives. This led them to the realization that they would be happier apart. Their love for each other helped them realize that they were only holding each other back from their dreams.
The Steve Pavlina Divorce Details
Following the divorce, Steve and Erin worked out the arrangements for their separation.
Since they owned two houses, living arrangements were not a problem. They came up with an arrangement that was mutually beneficial. Although Erin got the smaller house, it meant she had fewer debt and expenses to deal with. Steve, who didn’t mind taking the bigger financial responsibilities, took the bigger house and continued to provide for his family through alimony and childcare payments.
Since they continued to be good friends, they were able to continue being professionally related without running into any problems. They kept it a priority to maintain goodwill between each other, and this allowed them to continue working together smoothly.
The children went to Erin’s care, and since both Steve and Erin did not want a shared custody arrangement for the sake of the kids, they both think it would be best for Erin to get sole custody. The decision was arrived at amicably as well.
Most of the major decisions that make divorce a big trouble for most couples, Erin and Steve were able to resolve amicably. Their experience with separation is living proof that the Steve Pavlina self-help tips really do make a huge difference.
After the Divorce
After the divorce, Steve and Erin eased into their individual lives, but the experience has made them wiser and better. Many people who end up to 15 years of marriage sometimes don’t ever recover, but with the help of the Steve Pavlina divorce self-help, this does not have to be the case. With each of them free to pursue their respective desires, Steve and Erin finally found what they were looking for in life.
Although they faced a lot of criticism from the public after getting a divorce, Steve went on to show everyone that getting a divorce does not have to be such a bad thing. Following the separation, Steve delved into several personal growth projects that led him to discover his true desires and to learn what would help him attain long-term happiness. One of these projects is dedicated to polyamory. If you want to learn more about Steve’s experiment with polyamory, check out the Steve Pavlina polyamory section on this website.
So for those who are thinking of getting a divorce but are scared about it, Steve and Erin can help you through it. Based on their own experience, divorce does not have to be wrought with hurt, pain, disappointment, and betrayal. Instead, divorce can be considered as a new beginning, which opens up your life to new and better things. Steve does not only want to be of help to those who are in the middle of a rough divorce (as could easily have been the case with the Steve Pavlina divorce); as a self-help and personal development guru, Steve also offers advice on several other topics such as dealing with criticism the Steve Pavlina way.